Tuesday, 14 January 2014

Sense of entitlement


I was brought up to believe that you work hard for what you earn, and that you should not expect something for nothing. My parents arrived to the UK as immigrants from Ireland and worked incredibly hard for every penny they earned. I was encouraged to work throughout my university education, having been given the very best education that my parents could afford. It was a good lesson; very few people achieve great success without a lot of hard work. One of my father’s favourite quotes is by famous film producer, Samuel Goldwyn: “The harder I work, the luckier I get…”

In today’s society, we have a problem with those who claim benefits and social welfare illegitimately. We also have a problem with those who are obscenely wealthy. Personally, I have a problem with those who do work and have jobs but have a persistent chip on their shoulder about how everyone else is luckier than them, how they are so hard done by and how they are deserving of a much better existence. This sense of entitlement is incredible; I can’t help but wonder why they feel entitled to a much better life when they are unwilling to do anything to help themselves to achieve a better outcome?

Having started my career in the unforgiving environment of investment banking, I admit readily that I am probably quite difficult to work for and my standards are relentlessly high. To me, however, a commitment to high standards and to working hard is a basic requirement for achieving success. As a junior investment banker, I worked 90 – 100 hours per week almost every week for five years, and then 80 – 90 hours for week for a further four years. Three years running, I had to cancel Christmas because of a live deal. I got Christmas Day off but that was it. One year, I didn’t have a day of holiday for an entire year because I was involved constantly in live deals so there was no space for a holiday. I didn’t and don’t expect sympathy from anybody for this. It was my choice and it gave me the optionality that I have now in relation to my career and has afforded the opportunity to start my own business. I am grateful for the experience. It was always abundantly clear that if you didn’t like it, there were thousands of people who would happily take your place.

Having jumped from the world of investment banking to being an entrepreneur running my own business 18 months ago, the most challenging aspect is managing some people who share neither my ambition nor dedication. At the beginning of my entrepreneurial adventure, I hired the fiancée of my hairdresser to help me in relation to basic administrative/PA duties in the hope that she could grow into the business and have a career or at the very minimum a concrete role as my PA. With the benefit of hindsight, this was very foolish but I felt sorry for her and I believed she deserved a chance. Whilst she was essentially an unskilled worker, she was bright and industrious and I thought that her commitment to furthering herself was a demonstration of her intelligence as much as any qualification would have been. There was limited work to begin with but I paid her a fair wage every week regardless. Increasingly, however, the more fair I was, the more she asked for. Although there was no more than 20 hours work per week for six months, and she was being paid for 40 hours, she wanted holiday pay and in advance. When she returned from holiday, I asked her to attend a meeting and she asked me to move the meeting as she was very tired after a late flight and it would be easier if the meeting took place on a different day. Perhaps I had missed something but last time I checked a job was not designed to make the life of an employee easier…

It became clear quickly that this girl was someone who thought that because she said that she was there to help with anything, this was enough to show that she meant it, even if there was no intention to follow through with demonstrable action. She played expertly the card of an insecure young girl lacking in confidence, constantly thanking me for everything and for giving her an opportunity. Again, it seemed that by just saying thank you she felt that this showed she meant it sincerely. I didn’t want or need “thank you” though. I needed someone who was proactive, efficient and keen to learn.

As the admin tasks increased with the business, I realised that her attention to detail was not up to scratch. We missed securing tables at a restaurant opening for clients because she had not communicated effectively with the PR company; the details of partners and clients that she had input to my contacts database were misspelled on a regular basis. Despite asking her to go through the contacts a further three times, the legacy of the problem remains as I have the Chairman of the Premier League listed as Chairman of the “Primier League” and whenever I send or receive an email from Rory Godson, he shows up as “Rogy Godson”. When provided with feedback on her performance, the girl cried and said she felt that everyone was watching her and no one believed her. Quite why anyone would expect not to be supervised doing a job is beyond me.

I began to question myself; was I being unreasonable in terms of the expectations I had of her? I felt that I had tried to be fair but I was conscious that my background made me very uncompromising so I gave her another chance. When she called me at 10:30pm at night, breathlessly explaining that she was too stressed to sleep and she needed to know that I thought she was doing a good job, I was stunned at her lack of either judgement or professionalism. I explained calmly, however, that, while I thought she was a very sweet girl, I was neither her friend nor her therapist. I told her that I just needed her to do a good job, and that if she did this she had nothing  to worry about. She said that she understood and then proceeded to tell other employees that she was upset because I never asked how she was… Unable to cope with the tears and histrionics, I passed her off to be managed by my Events team, who found that she was unable to complete basic data inputting tasks within a reasonable timeframe. Despite being told repeatedly to ask questions in order to learn and progress, she never did so. In fact, the only time she asked questions or asserted herself was to query her managers and explain how uncomfortable it made her that they questioned her efficiency and productivity.

Just before Christmas, I held a meeting at our new house. This was foolish. The day after the meeting, the girl wrote me an email, explaining that she thought she deserved a pay increase. I refused the request on the basis that she was still not working anything close to 40 hours per week and had delivered zero added value to the business. Once I started thinking about what I was paying her against her delivery, I came to the conclusion that the arrangement was not working. In a larger company, she would never have survived the first few months and in an investment bank she would never have made the grade to get a job in the first place. In my start-up, she was given chance after chance with no demonstrable progression in terms of attitude, understanding or skills over the course of a year. It took me a month to tell her that I was terminating her position. With the benefit of hindsight, I can see that I was concerned about her reaction. I anticipated that the conversation would not go well but I had expected tears and angst, which I hate.

Instead, I found myself on the receiving end of calculated vitriol, which was easier though surprising. Her behaviour post-termination confirmed what I thought all along; she was a bright girl. Her attention to deal in terms of arguing her case for additional pay and holiday pay was commendable, though all the more notable given that such skills had been so glaringly absent in relation to anything required by her job. When I refused to make any additional discretionary payments, she went on the offensive with insults such as “I think the problem here is that you can’t afford me” and multiple instructions along the lines of “you have to pay me £930”. There were moments where I was beginning to wonder who worked for who? Had I got it all upside down?

In response to this, I attempted to remain measured and fair, saying:

I’m sorry it has come to this. You have always known that Vita nel Lusso was a start-up company, and that there would be no training. I gave you an opportunity as a favour... If my understanding is correct, you had been unemployed for a year until I gave you the opportunity.

Your tasks at Vita nel Lusso were basic. You have had a year to learn from very good people – training was unnecessary. I need people who want to be part of the business in the long-term. Sadly, I just do not think it is for you. You are a bright girl but fundamentally an unskilled worker who has been paid a very fair wage in relation to the hours worked.

 In relation to the phone, you were told many times to arrange the phone and I would cover the cost. Instead of problems, you ought to have delivered solutions. 

As before, my position remains the same. If you prefer not to accept, I wish you the very best for the future.

She was arguing that I should pay a £50 phone bill for her house phone. I had told her repeatedly to get a blackberry and I would cover the cost. She never did. Finally, her boyfriend bought her a blackberry but she never contacted the company IT guy to resolve connectivity issues. It also took her five months to add a signature to her email address. Her response to this was: “This isn’t fair” and “I don’t need to spend my money to buy a new phone. You needed to buy it and give it to me. But you didn’t”. Given that she was supposed to be acting in some capacity as a PA, I am still unclear as to why I should have been sorting out her phone…

The saga rolled on and over the Christmas period and into 2014. I offered to pay her everything that she was owed in relation to hours that she had worked. She wanted more and told me she had spoken with a barrister. I handed the matter to my lawyer after which the matter was quickly settled on the terms I had offered originally, and I received an email saying: “I want to finish this chapter and I want to move on”. Alleluia! You and me both…

Imagine my shock then when I heard from a client on 3rd January that she had been in touch with him, offering to continue working for him but undercutting us on price. From a girl who had always told me she was cripplingly lacking in confidence and paranoid about getting everything right, and very shy, I found this quite a turnaround in character. I sent her an email, explaining that it was inappropriate to poach clients, and that such juvenile behaviour vindicated entirely my decision to terminate her employment. The response was: “This is just one of the lies that you came up with and trust me I know a lot more of them. Also I never thought that somebody can twist all this situation as you did. Apparently, I am a bad person, but god is watching and good luck to you with your life and your lies. And please stop bothering me right now!”

Extraordinary behaviour. I finished the conversation, conceding that if it helped her to feel better by convincing herself that I had lied, it was her prerogative. I didn’t lie. Lies did not come into it. The decision of termination was a professional decision based on the needs of the business and the performance of an employee. Getting dragged into an emotional debate in a professional scenario was uncomfortable.

I can only hope that she learned some lessons throughout the process and will draw on the situation to move forward in life with a more mature attitude. Otherwise, I fear life will be one disappointment after another, where everyone else is in the wrong. I know that I certainly learned some valuable lessons:

i)                  Never give anybody a job because you feel sorry for them or as a favour

ii)                Never assume that employees operate on the same professional wavelength as you

iii)              Never allow the boundaries of personal and professional to become blurred. The moment I invited her to my house, her perception of me changed, together with her expectations in relation to what she was entitled to from me

iv)              Never hire the fiancée of your hairdresser; my biggest problem for the new year is to find a new salon that does great highlights…

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